Saya Kecewa: Teacher and Students

Being a teacher is not easy. It makes your soul up and down like roller coaster. Deep inside my heart I only want to share all knowledge I know even the smallest or biggest one my students need to know even though they think they don't.

I only want to share, share honestly without lie. Sometimes students make you so happy because of their positive deeds, but sometimes they make you cry, crying like a baby.

For me it's okay feeling that way once, twice or three times, but God... if it happens many times... I'm only human, I cannot cope it...

Sometimes I really want to cry, but should I cry in front of them just to show that what they have done to me was really hurting my heart? I'm not that kind of teacher. I try to be patient, to hide every single pain I felt. Try not to be too childish to show it.

Well, I try to tell myself that this is all for them, none in return to me. It's just kind of subjection, I got salary but well, that's not the only thing I want. Deep down inside me, I really want to see them grow as a very successful children.

I don't really know will they still remember me when they grow up, when I grow older, when thye have got their successful life, when I was suffering from my old diseases.

Saya dan Puisi: Usual Vs Unusual

It is usual when a boyfriend often comes to his girl's house, but a girl often comes to her boy's house??

That's weird and so unusual, how could she do it?!

It is usual when a girlfriend rarely comes to her boy's house, but a boy rarely comes to his girl's house??

That's weird and so unusual, how could he do it?!

Saya dan Puisi: Have You People Ever Felt

Have you people ever felt

Like your age is getting older

Older than you ever known

Like your life is getting shorter

Shorter than you have ever asked

Like your hope disappears so fast

Even faster than you have ever thought

Like you are fear of your own death

The most fearful feeling you have ever felt

Everyday you wake up just to find

That you are dying on the sand of

Weaknesses, helplessness, fearfulness

I am feeling them now

Feeling like I'm going to be buried

Feeling like I'm going to be forgotten

Feeling like I'm going to die

Saya dan Puisi: Tonight Sky

I used to be afraid of the night sky
I thought it was frightening and terrifying
But this night I don't feel it
I don't know why, I really enjoy watching it
Watching the stars try to show their existance
I love tonight sky

Saya dan Puisi: Can Anyone Answer My Question

Where is everyone?
Where are they going?
Can't they hear me?
Can't they see me?
Why don't they notice me?

Why can I see me there?
Laying down on a small wooden bed
With pale skin and
I can't see my breast going up and down
No breath

Can I come back?
Can anyone answer this question?

Saya dan Puisi: Trace the Past

Have you ever look back

when your way suddenly stopped

have you ever measure

how many miles have you stepped

that’s the way i feel now

i just don’t know how

the brain has been distracted

the memory fades away

only a little shade of history left

if i were given a time

i would trace what i have left

i would take evey little piece of my memory

from my history

seeing an old friends, old teachers, family, relatives

who were forgotten

who were left behind

who had passed away

who had moved to different time and place

they have led us to where we are now

but forgotten

i would take every little piece of my memory

from my history

to recall the laughter we shared

to recall the sadness we passed

to recall all the ups and downs

i miss them, i do miss them

i miss all of them

i miss you...

Saya dan Puisi: That Black Point

suddenly everything seems so old

suddenly everything seems so far away

suddenly everything seems fade away

running doesn't change anything

walking so slow will be left behind

scream out loud won't be heard

whispering so soft will be forgotten

suddenly cold runs from the tip of my fingers

from the toe to the whole part of the body

blood become as solid as stone

the heart beats so fast

the black point comes closer

faster than i could ever thought

the shade of darkness comes....